I have been struggling with this whole I have different parts that while I am conscious of them they still take over and make the decision for me. I know that I am not Sybil in that I lose the core me when they take over so I was confused to what it was exactly that was going on. Yesterday, my therapist explained that there is a spectrum for dissociation – the low end being the normal everyday “where did I put my keys” to where you leave your body and view the bad things that are happening to it from outside of it to DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) where the alters take over the consciousness of the core person. She says that what I am experiencing is between the later two. Due to my need to read and be as knowledgable as I can about what is going on with me this is a little hard for me, because there is a lot on DID but not so much on what I’m experiencing. My therapist says she will try to get me some information.
In the mean time, I have decided to embrace them and try to learn what I can from them. They have to be there for a reason, I just need to figure out that reason.
Also in therapy yesterday we hit on another part that has been laying low since my grandfather died. It made me realize that there are more parts in me that are waiting to come out and that I need to be more aware of who they are and what they do for me so I am starting a page under About Me to house this information.