BECCA

My name is Becca and I’m 16. I’m a total teenager; a rebel, someone who likes to shock the world. I want the clothes, the funky hair color/cut, more than one earring in each ear, and the make-up. And when I say make-up, I mean heavy black eyeliner, glitter eye shadow, black or dark purple nail polish, and dramatic lipstick. I guess you could say I’m a cross between a Goth queen and a bitchin’ biker baby. I want desperately to put purple, teal and hot pink highlights in my hair (but boring momma Ana won’t let me). If Ana would let me, I’d have a tattoo somewhere on my body but that would not go over in “A” family or with “A” religious beliefs. (STUPID RULES! – majority rules suck BIG time) I mean come on – I don’t even believe in God or more to the point I don’t believe that God gives a damn about us. Not that I get much say about that – I guess I’ll have to make do with what I can get away with, the funky make-up, feather earrings, and showing off some skin, even if it isn’t enough for my liking. And I ditch the God/religion stuff whenever I can.

I want to tell the world and our stupid system’s rules to go F*&@ themselves, because I doesn’t care what other people think. If they don’t like it that’s just fine.

I first started coming to the surface when “A” was a teenager. I was just there to help “A” out. I came out when “A” couldn’t handle things – plus I helped get rid of the things that “A” didn’t want – the trips to her grandparents, the seizures that were not being controlled because her mom wouldn’t put her on medicine. I fought to get “A” all the fun stuff she wouldn’t have got otherwise – her pierced earrings (multiple holes), the ability to wear make-up and the right to dye her hair away from its blonde color to red (yeah it wasn’t purple and hot pink, but it’s better than baby blonde). I’m the one that came out when we had to be in a group situation with other kids our age.

Ok, so like I guess you could say I have some bad points too (whatever) – so I’m a bit of a thrill-seeker, and I like to drink way too much whiskey (as if there is such a thing). I like dress and act inappropriately, according to my mom and Ana. I’m like always horny. I mean come on I’m a sixteen year old, what do you expect! And what sixteen year old girl doesn’t want to find a guy. Although once I find one I’m not so sure what to do with them. I Sooo don’t like being petted and mauled. So I guess you could say I’m more of a tease then a follow through type of girl. I think this is because mostly I feel hollow and dead inside. In order not to feel this way, I tend to eat junk food, they call it emotional eating or some crap like that. I call it being a teenager. I also tend to cut myself or otherwise hurt myself just so that I can feel something/ anything. Kenny, guy friend in the system, is annoyingly good about coming out when I want to cut. I guess he’s there to save me or something. I know Kenny wants something more than to be my friend but he is really good at not crossing that line. Sometimes I wish Kenny had not decided it was time to come out/ make himself know to “A” and the rest of the system. Then maybe I’d still get to cut every once in a while. What’s the saying – “It hurts so good”! Now I don’t get to have the good pain, anymore. At least he doesn’t try to tell me what to eat, after all he a teen too so he likes the junk food too.

I loves 80’s music (the music from “A”teen years) and music with a highly sensual natural to it. I likes teen movies, scary movies and stuff with vampires and werewolves (hello, teen girl, here!) I also likes roller coasters.